These days, blogging is taking up less of my time and thoughts than it used to. I feel somewhat troubled by that, because it used to form such a major part of my daily life not so very long ago. Thinking back on that, though, I have to admit that the times when blogging was a large part of my life were also times when I was least happy with the state of my life.
In fact, I actually commenced blogging during one of the darkest times — when I was first diagnosed with clinical depression back in 1998. At that point I was in an unhappy marriage, my mother had passed away a few months earlier, I was struggling to live a life that was a complete lie, and… well, I guess I needed the outlet, then.
These days I am in a different place. I am happier, dare I say it, I am content with where I am, with who I am and with what I am doing, but at the same time, I recognise that I have made wonderful connections with some fantastic people via these pages where I have expressed my deepest and also my shallowest thoughts. It’s something I don’t wish to lose, but it’s also something that requires time, thought, and effort, and I am putting most of those three things into other pursuits just now.
There are my chickens… the beloved rainbow flock…
There is my garden…
And yet, I still find that I want to write blogs, and stay connected with the friends I have made through this medium. I don’t have as much time as I would like, but I still feel that this is an important outlet for me, even if I just post a photograph that I snap during my day in the garden, or a snippet (with photos) of some activity I have taken part in during the week, it is better than nothing. It might not be as indepth as I might have written, even a year ago, but it’s still a blog, I guess.
I just need to try and remember to do it so that I don’t wind up with so much to tell about that it feels overwhelming so I never start.
I hope my readers will forgive me for not writing the long, and (sometimes) thoughtful posts I used to write, but perhaps, it will help you to know that the reason I no longer write them so often is that I am happy. My wandering heart has found a home and that is a very good thing!